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I Just Want To Be Happy Again

by The Menagerie

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k41r05
k41r05 thumbnail
k41r05 I have already known this for years and I like it so much. Makes me think about all the towns in the nearby valleys adjacent to my hometown I have never truly been, and about all young people there, living through their stories, and having their special spot of nostalgia, just like me, but hidden and shrouded from my point of view. Favorite track: Ditch Lines.
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1.
Ditch Lines 05:12
Watching as you walked out on me, images you burned in my memory. I try to wash them out with fake happiness; I want to say I’m okay, but I’m far from okay. I watch the world around me wondering if I’ll ever find my place. I’ve become everything I hate; the burden of the world. I’ll choke - I’ll wash away all the fake tears you shed for me. My love is shining through a cracked heart. You’re not worth it. Do you remember everything you told me underneath that star filled sky when you were looking in my eyes? Because it seems no matter how hard I try, I cant forget what you told me that night. I still feel you in my chest with every mistake I make, telling me that I’ll be okay. I’m not okay.
2.
You don’t know what hell looks like til you’ve looked into your own eyes and not know the person looking back at you. I don’t know myself and no one knows me;I’m trapped in this hole I keep digging and digging.
3.
Les Yeux 03:28
What have I become? I remember you used to love walking in the rain so no one could see you cry. At least it was raining on the day you were buried so no one could see my face; I remember you saying “Nothing lasts forever. Not diamonds, not gold, not the lies, or the stories you told. ‘Cause we both know, one day everything we love will one day turn to stone, just dont forget my name when its carved into its headstone in the graveyard behind my family’s home where my uncle is buried beside the woman he married, just steps from his mother who buried her son on March 4th. Just make me that promise.”
4.
The day you left was devastating. It was the worst day of my life, and I never thought I’d make it out of this depression alive. Now Im lost in your eyes, and I’m stuck in your smile, but that will never be enough if I’m not by your side. You got the best of me; Seclusion got whats left of me. Now all that’s left are the ashes that remain. The hardest thing I ever had to say was ‘Darling farewell’ watched you from a stairwell, said ‘Darling, farewell’. From that point on you’ve been gone, leaving behind this city that we love. If I tremble beneath the weight of the world on my shoulders, then maybe your smile will make me stronger. I remember those summers reading Fitzgerald just to lose ourselves. Oh, how great it felt.
5.
I had a heart of gold and you sold it for scrap They tell me the best get the worst, but that, I wouldn’t mind I wouldn’t mind the worst, the hurt, the sadness, or the grief I’d give anything to feel anything again, be it broken ribs or chipped teeth. I just wanna be happy again I JUST WANNA BE HAPPY AGAIN I’M SO NUMB. Now that the winter’s come and gone, tell me, where did you go? Only God really knows. You hit that first note, I swear to God it set me free, and in the midst of my despair, I swear to God I feel you there. I never meant to leave you behind with everyone I love in the rear view stinging my eyes. I had a heart of gold.

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We have worked very hard on this for a long time and we hope you enjoy it. Listen to Messes and Leaving.

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released September 22, 2015

Written by The Menagerie
Recording/Mixing by Perry Wesley (Messes) in Ryan's laundry room and Josh Hess' garage. Thanks P-Wes.
Mastering by Bill at Azimuth Mastering.

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The Menagerie Somerset, Kentucky

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